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Jul. 8th, 2006 04:27 pmFriday, July 07, 2006
friends.
Current mood: crushed
so tonight i learned a valuable lesson.
everything you think is real can just be the demented dreams of your own mind.
people that you thought you could trust and lean on are just fake and have no real intentions of supporting you when you need it.
when nothing is said, it's not the proclimation of the end. it's just plain cowardace, and not being able to deal with emotions.
when people find 'better' friends, it means that they are done using you. You were a crutch so they wouldn't be alone when it counted, and now that it doesnt, your part is done.
there are no such things as friends.
there are people you love, people you'd die for, and then the people you dont know, and the ones you hold in contempt.
___
pirates wasn't as good as I wanted it to be.
mostly because of what jennifer did. its great that ive been replaced. fine, whatever. but i wont take the bullshit answer of 'me ignoring you was telling you we're done' no. that's you being a fucking pussy and not saying what you felt.
im tired of people holding back their feelings because that's apparently better in life. no. its not. it makes things worse, because youre not happy, and no one's really happy. im just so fucking tired of this stupid town, with the people in it who just make me miserable. when i go to san marcos, everything is going to change....i'll find people who are mature enough to handle themselves and their emotions, and maybe I'll stop getting hurt.
dammit. tonight was going to be so good...and instead I spent half the movie freaking crying because i cared about someone, only to have them stab me in the back. fuck life.
*sighs* thank gods for ryan..
friends.
Current mood: crushed
so tonight i learned a valuable lesson.
everything you think is real can just be the demented dreams of your own mind.
people that you thought you could trust and lean on are just fake and have no real intentions of supporting you when you need it.
when nothing is said, it's not the proclimation of the end. it's just plain cowardace, and not being able to deal with emotions.
when people find 'better' friends, it means that they are done using you. You were a crutch so they wouldn't be alone when it counted, and now that it doesnt, your part is done.
there are no such things as friends.
there are people you love, people you'd die for, and then the people you dont know, and the ones you hold in contempt.
___
pirates wasn't as good as I wanted it to be.
mostly because of what jennifer did. its great that ive been replaced. fine, whatever. but i wont take the bullshit answer of 'me ignoring you was telling you we're done' no. that's you being a fucking pussy and not saying what you felt.
im tired of people holding back their feelings because that's apparently better in life. no. its not. it makes things worse, because youre not happy, and no one's really happy. im just so fucking tired of this stupid town, with the people in it who just make me miserable. when i go to san marcos, everything is going to change....i'll find people who are mature enough to handle themselves and their emotions, and maybe I'll stop getting hurt.
dammit. tonight was going to be so good...and instead I spent half the movie freaking crying because i cared about someone, only to have them stab me in the back. fuck life.
*sighs* thank gods for ryan..