distantvampire: (Default)
[personal profile] distantvampire
I lost my best friend yesterday. His health took a sharp decline and over the past week he just...fell to pieces right in front of me. I've never had a rat to live so long, but Elton would have been 3 in May. The day I picked him up we went to just look. Out of the 10 or so little boys was this massive rat in there, herding them all away from the humans. He looked up at me with those big eyes, one pink and one black, and I knew he was it. He was my first dumbo, and he was the reason I became a serious rat keeper. I learned so much through him, because of him, every rat's life that I Have touched is different in some way - I'd like to think for the better.

Two days ago I was holding him up to my chest and he was licking my chin gently, and I knew this came fast because he'd seem me suffer through losing my three other boys. Last week we was running around terrorizing everyone, and now he's just gone. It was fast, and I knew this was for me. I told him it was okay if he left, that if it was his time I'd be happy for him to be able to rest and be with the rest of our 'family.' And he just kept bruxing (a happy noise they make by grinding their teeth) and licking my fingers / chin. I was sobbing, Ryan was crying too, and inside I was screaming that I'd never be okay, I didn't want to face a day without him.

For months when I first got him I bribed him with every sort of treat one could imagine. He quickly won my heart over from the scared manrat who had been returned twice because he wasn't affectionate and was already 8 months old when I got him to a little boy who bounded up to the cage when my door opened and who knew his name and would love nothing better than to sit on my arm or my shoulder all day. Hoodies were his favorite because then he could just fall asleep and Id carry him close all day long. Elton taught the people I worked with and even total strangers how wonderful and sweet rats can be - he had kisses for everyone and never met a stranger.

It's like I've let a child go - and there are people who will scoff at this, but I don't have it in me to mother human kids, so I have my pets instead. And it's like I've just lost my baby...there's a part of my heart that will always be with him, he'll never be replaced.

(no subject)

Date: 2009-03-20 03:31 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] morbidelirium.livejournal.com
I'm sorry. D: <3

At least your little guy had a really good life and was wanted and loved for it. He could have done a lot worse with someone other than you. :)

Profile

distantvampire: (Default)
distantvampire

September 2010

S M T W T F S
   123 4
56789 1011
12131415161718
19202122232425
2627282930  

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios