hah, go me. I keep making so many messes of things that it's not even funny.
and ryan deserves a million medals and stuff for putting up with me.
it's kinda odd, how I sit here and pour my heart and soul into something that tends to cause more harm than good. Some things that come from it are good, but the majority of it just ends up making more problems.
I shouldn't be so un-confrontational, a person really deserves to hear what's going on when they're involved face to face. But well, I'm afraid to confront people, thus, you guys deal with some long-winded rant about how I feel regarding somehting and it tends to give a one sided look into a situation.
Guys, I know you all mean really well, and it's my fault for not just locking the topics or anything, but a lot of the comments that have been left really aren't due...
when you read a journal, especially one of an immature, PMS-ing teenage female, chances are the people she talks about wont be portrayed in the proper sense. and I dont think from the comments I've gotten that I'm showing Ryan's true colors here.
he's not a jerk, and he's not just in it for sex. I just think that in reading the stuff that I've been feeling for the past week or so, it's just how he came off in the moment.....and I also know that's kinda the point of being 'friends with beifits' is to not be together but still have options.....but that's not his goal really.
I'm going to lock the last few posts and just delete the comments....I think since it's a mute matter, it's best to be forgotten.
OK, take this random act of kindess from him. Today, I got a text message. "You like Wolverine, right?" so I send one back (while driving......BAD IDEA KIDS!) 'yup' and then about 10, there is a knock on the door. Well, I get this bag handed to me, and I look in to find a shirt with Wolvie on it! for NO REASON.
Well, we talked about stuff, by the way, this morning. (after he apparenlty read some of the stuff I've been writing) and we've gotten back together....so it's not awkward anymore.
here's something I do what comments on.....what makes me so caught on a title? I dont understand why a kiss yesterday gave me a weird feeling in my gut, and today, it's just that same carefree rush?
I think....I think I'm just going to take a break from online stuff for awhile. Including roleplaying.
I'm going to extend my personal vacation till the 20th, and just enjoy life beyond this moniter.
I really do thank you all for at least giving me support and stuff. it's great to know you all care ^^
and ryan deserves a million medals and stuff for putting up with me.
it's kinda odd, how I sit here and pour my heart and soul into something that tends to cause more harm than good. Some things that come from it are good, but the majority of it just ends up making more problems.
I shouldn't be so un-confrontational, a person really deserves to hear what's going on when they're involved face to face. But well, I'm afraid to confront people, thus, you guys deal with some long-winded rant about how I feel regarding somehting and it tends to give a one sided look into a situation.
Guys, I know you all mean really well, and it's my fault for not just locking the topics or anything, but a lot of the comments that have been left really aren't due...
when you read a journal, especially one of an immature, PMS-ing teenage female, chances are the people she talks about wont be portrayed in the proper sense. and I dont think from the comments I've gotten that I'm showing Ryan's true colors here.
he's not a jerk, and he's not just in it for sex. I just think that in reading the stuff that I've been feeling for the past week or so, it's just how he came off in the moment.....and I also know that's kinda the point of being 'friends with beifits' is to not be together but still have options.....but that's not his goal really.
I'm going to lock the last few posts and just delete the comments....I think since it's a mute matter, it's best to be forgotten.
OK, take this random act of kindess from him. Today, I got a text message. "You like Wolverine, right?" so I send one back (while driving......BAD IDEA KIDS!) 'yup' and then about 10, there is a knock on the door. Well, I get this bag handed to me, and I look in to find a shirt with Wolvie on it! for NO REASON.
Well, we talked about stuff, by the way, this morning. (after he apparenlty read some of the stuff I've been writing) and we've gotten back together....so it's not awkward anymore.
here's something I do what comments on.....what makes me so caught on a title? I dont understand why a kiss yesterday gave me a weird feeling in my gut, and today, it's just that same carefree rush?
I think....I think I'm just going to take a break from online stuff for awhile. Including roleplaying.
I'm going to extend my personal vacation till the 20th, and just enjoy life beyond this moniter.
I really do thank you all for at least giving me support and stuff. it's great to know you all care ^^